I lost my voice

Since Sunday evening I haven't been able to talk, well at least not much. Being a singer that is a little bit of a problem, being in phone sales (my day gig) is a huge problem. I've been drinking tea, putting honey in it, trying not to talk when I can help it and doing everything I know how to get it to come back. But you know what, even though I lost my voice, I have not lost my message. 

My voice isn't where my identity comes from. Yes, right now I miss singing. I have shows that are coming up and several tryouts for different things that I can wait to share with you, but it'll be hard to do that if I can't sing. 

Times like this help me put things back into perspective. 2 and a half years ago my daughter was born with a heart that was designed different. In fact you could say that the plumbing was hooked up the opposite way. Her heart was pumping blood from the lungs to through the heart and back out to the lungs whilst the other side was pumping un-oxygenated blood from the body through the heart and back to the body. 

I'm no doctor but that ain't how it's supposed to work. 

But GOD.

There's aways a but and this is a big one. He designed her heart and even put a huge whole in it so oxygen was still getting to the rest of her body. Enough at least to where we thought she was fine for the first 24 hours we had her. 

Long story short, 16 days after she was born, she was having open heart surgery. 8 days after that, we were at home. It was amazing to see God use her small little heart, the size of a strawberry, to bring glory to Himself. 

Yesterday, we went back for a yearly checkup and her Cardiologist said you couldn't pick her out of a crowd for being a heart baby. She's doing great. 

Worst case scenario he did say we might have to do another surgery down the road, but at this point that's unlikely. 

So what does this have to do with my voice?

I don't need a voice to speak. My daughter taught me more about faith, trust and love before she was even a month old. I believe with my whole heart that God uses all situations to glorify Himself and for the ultimate good of people, even when we don't understand it. 

It could be that I lost my voice just so you would get this email, read it and consider how to tell your story. It could be that I lost it just so I remember to always be thankful for the way God has allowed me to serve and to hold it with an open hand. It could be a lot of things, but this I do know, God is continually working to call people to Himself, and if it takes shutting me up to get that to happen, I'm all for it. 

- matt